#1- He is human.
Shocking I know, but it is true. Your pastor has his bad days, and gets discouraged. He gets lonely, and just plain tired. He has weaknesses and faults just like any other person. Because he is human it also means he doesn't have unlimited time and energy. He cannot possibly visit every sick person, follow up with every family who stops attending church, or keep up with every single prayer request mentioned. He may actually forget to ask you about your niece who had her tonsils out not because his lack of concern but because he is fully human. Please grant him grace.
#2- He genuinely loves you and cares about what is happening in your life.
Even though he may forget that your 40th anniversary has come and gone it doesn't mean his affection for you is any less real. The pastor prays for his congregation, cries over their hurts and brokenness and longs for them to know deeply what a true and intimate relationship with Jesus looks like. He would never want to do anything that would cause you harm and if he has ever offended you then please remember the next point.
#3- He is approachable.
If you have concerns, frustrations or questions your pastor would much rather you bring those to his attention than talk to everyone else excluding him. You never know...he might actually agree with your observations! :-) Because he genuinely cares about you, your concerns are important to him. He wants to preach in a way that challenges and engages you. He wants to make sure you are fed so that in turn you will go feed others. If your pastor is growing in his personal relationship with the Lord humility will be apparent as he allows you to voice your concerns and listens to your frustrations.
#4- He is still trying to grow in his ministry and calling as a pastor.
This means he won't always get things right. He realizes that his growth as a Christian and more specifically as a pastor will not end until the day his Savior calls him home. Just like there is no manual on how to raise a child, there is no handbook on how to be the perfect pastor (although many books have been written). He spends countless hours every week pouring over commentaries, praying for guidance with the text as well as for the hearts of those who will hear the Word of the Lord. He longs for the Lord to speak mightily through him in order that many will come know Christ and grow in godliness.
#5- He has a heart for God.
This "job" that he holds is not a job at all but a specific calling from the Lord. Your pastor desires to serve Christ with all that he has because daily he is growing more deeply in his own walk with God. He spends hours in the Word not just to piece together a sermon but also because he longs to spend time with his Savior. He puts in personal time with the Lord aside from preparing for Sunday. He memorizes scripture, prays, and digs into the Bible just as he encourages you to do the same.
For those of you in ministry, married to someone who is, or who grew up as a PK, is there anything else you could think to add?