China's Stolen Children

You can view the entire documentary on youtube. It is heartbreaking to hear these stories...so what does this mean for us? My heart remains burdened.

A storm

Seascape Study with Rain Cloud- John Constable

This is a fairly new painting for me. I have a vague feeling that I've seen it before in an art class perhaps but it caught my eye tonight. I think it's stunning. Constable mainly painted landscapes which were never a favorite subject of mine. I think I enjoy art that is a little more gritty and not so picturesque...or maybe it was just his style of painting that originally turned me off to his work. The second picture is one of John's well known works and well...it's beautiful for sure but not my favorite style.

Anyway...tonight has been a rough night at work. Nothing in particular has happened and life right now is blessed beyond measure but I'm just plain worn out. Constable's painting just seems to speak directly to how I'm feeling at this exact moment. I feel burdened about many things. Earlier in the day I met with a good friend who is struggling through a storm in her spiritual life and though God remains faithful she is so overcome with emotion and buffeted so hard by the attacks of Satan that she has trouble seeing all that God is doing.

At work tonight I've also been reminded of how easy my life is. I live in a country where I can go to church on Sunday and meet with my small group every Wednesday night without fear of prison or death. There is a dire situation that calls for our prayers taking place in India. In Orrisa India (and in other parts as well) there has been an outbreak of widespread persecution of Christians by Vishwa Hindu Parishad (VHP) extremists. Believers are being attacked, and orphanages and chuches are being burned down with people trapped inside. It is horrific and reminds me that we must join with our brothers and sisters in prayer asking the Lord to give them strength and safety in the midst of such tragedy and that despite the terror taking place that the Gospel would still be proclaimed to free the captive. Pray especially for the salvation of those who are participating in these acts of violence. To read more of what is happening in India you can check out this blog: http://christianpersecutionindia.blogspot.com/

Well there is not much I can say that seems relevant or of much importance after speaking of all that is taking place in India. So please be in prayer for the turmoil that country is in . My heart is heavy...Lord be with them.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year...almost...

Is it bad that I'm already looking forward to Christmas? Yeah, yeah I know I'm ridiculous but there is just something about that time of year that makes it one of my favorite holidays ever! My poor husband thinks I'm a nut and he laughs at me when I admit to him that I'm looking forward to listening and singing to Christmas music, stringing popcorn and cranberries or baking Christmas cookies....I look forward to starting those types of family traditions with our kids (which hopefully won't be too far down the road). Part of the excitement has to do with the great memories I have about Christmas time from my childhood, which I will have to share at a later date...like when it is actually winter.

So okay I admit that I'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of fall, the leaves changing, Thanksgiving time and eventually Christmas. So for now I guess my Christmas cds will have to stay tucked away for another couple of months but it wouldn't hurt to get started on Christmas lists for my family. (Now is the time to put in your wish lists members of the Locke and Groves clan.)

104 days till Christmas (I promise I won't count down every day...I'm not that crazy!! ;-)

Too long

Wow, it has been way too long since I posted on here. I feel like the past couple of weeks have been a blur. Since my last post, Jon started his fall semester of classes and we brought home our cute puppy Paisley, who now weighs in at 31 pounds!! Jon's classes are going well but I've struggled to adapt to his hectic schedule which leaves us with little time together on our days off. Thankfully I have a puppy to look after which takes up quite a bit of my free time (I'll post pictures soon).

Paisley has been doing well. She is such a cute dog and I adore her...even when she is attempting to eat our couch. Thankfully due to the watchful eye of both me and my husband, Paisley has yet to chew anything up. *knock on wood* This coming Saturday we will be taking her to a puppy class at the Humane Society so that she can get some good socialization with other dogs. This will also help give us the tools we need to properly train her.

On a more serious note, I have felt burdened. Lately my heart has been restless, so much so that it interrupts my sleep during the day and clouds my mind when I'm working. I'm not really sure where this all came from. Part of this could be due to the fact that I'm tired of my job and I find no fulfillment in it. My heart feels kind of empty and I wonder what I'm supposed to be doing. I feel stupid even writing this down. It's odd because a few months ago I was going through these same feelings and I never really worked through them. So now, here they are again. What is God's call on my life?


I know part of my calling is as a helpmate to my husband, especially as he goes into ministry. However, I also know that the Lord has a calling on my life to use the gifts he has given me to glorify him and share the gospel...but what is that calling? Do I need to go back to school? Should I look for another job? The big problem here is that I'm not even sure what I'm called to do so I don't know where to turn.


Here are some of the things that are heavy on my heart:

- God has recently awakened my heart toward adoption and the plight of abandoned children. (I'm tired of dealing with spoiled teenagers who feel entitled to everything...ugh. I think I'm a little burnt out on work.)
http://www.truevisiontv.com/china/index.htm

http://www.channel4.com/fourdocs/archive/the_dying_room.html

- I've always had a heart for missions. I would love to visit India!!

- Evangelism has always been something I feel compelled to do.

- The lukewarm living in churches today makes me angry (I've found myself in that situation too often and I'm sick of it.) I want to see churches filled with praying people whose hearts are hungry for the word, worship, prayer, and evangelism. Maybe that is why I would love to go overseas...things would be very different in China or India...

I've thought about returning to school. If I went back I could study social work or anthropology (mainly because that fascinates me) but why would I get degrees in these areas? Geez, I don't know. I would love to work for a missions organization and help plan trips and maybe even travel some. It would also be amazing if God called us overseas. So many thoughts and questions. Maybe I'm just supposed to learn to be content where I'm at, but I sense that there is more to it than just that.

So yeah, there are my thoughts in a jumbled mess because I haven't yet sorted through it all. Jon reminded me yesterday that I need to be seeking the Lord about this and I know he is right. Jon can't tell me the answer and I can't find it in a book. I need to seek the Lord's wisdom and guidance. I just want to do something dramatic and live a life abandoned to God. I want to comfort the orphans, feed the hungry, and share the word of God to those who are lost...my life in Christ should be more marked by my actions. So here I am waiting on the Lord...I could use some prayer.

Isaiah 6

Transfiguration- Cornelis Monsma

In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple.

Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another: "Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory."

At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.

"Woe to me!" I cried. "I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty." Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, "See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for."

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" (Isaiah 6:1-8)

--------------

This passage was presented to me twice the other day, once when I was spending quiet time with the Lord and a second time that same day during church. I have always loved this passage and each time I read it I cannot help but ask myself if this is how I view God and if that is so than how does it affect the way I live.

I've been reading through Whatever Happened to Worship by A.W. Tozer and it is nothing less than beautiful and incredibly powerful. The last chapter I finished is called "Awed by the Presence of God." The basic premise of this chapter is a fresh look at some of the characteristics of God, mainly his Holiness. Tozer speaks about the fact that God is other than us, and there should be a sort of strangeness when we encounter the God of all creation. This transcendent God that we follow leaves his imprint on our lives and as we follow him there will be a mystery surrounding his followers as well. We should be "walking mysteries." "Through the leading and the power of the Holy Spirit, the Christian is involved in a daily life and habit that cannot be explained." When we come face to face with the truth of the Living God we come before a Holy God unblemished in every way.

"There should be a birth from above and within. There should be the terror of seeing ourselves in violent contrast to the holy, holy, holy God. Unless we come into this place of conviction and pain, I am not sure how deep and real our repentance will ever be...With each of us, if we are to have that assurance of forgiveness and restored moral innocence, the fire of God's grace must touch us. It is only through the depths of the forgiving love of God that men and women can be restored and made ready to serve Him." (Page 76 & 77)

"I tell you again that God has saved us to be worshipers. May God show us a vision of ourselves that will disvalue us to the point of total devaluation. From there He can raise us up to worship Him and praise Him and to witness." (page 78)

Yours

The Chapman family has been on my heart ever since the tragic accident that took the life of their youngest daughter Maria. I've followed their story since May and I have been in awe of the strength that the Lord has given them during this unbearable heartache. I have watched some interviews with this family lately and I can't help but walk away praising God for his faithfulness. I can only imagine the thousands of people who have been impacted by their story. They have shared with striking honesty the struggle of this journey but through it all God's name continues to be glorified. There is no way to fully understand the God we serve but there is hope in knowing that we belong to God, in the midst of joy and in the darkest valley of death we are His.

Here is a new verse that Steven wrote for his song "Yours." It's powerful. You can hear the latest version of it on napster. (http://play.napster.com/track/24693158)

I've been following their story through Steven's manager's blog and I want to encourage you to check it every once and and while to be reminded to keep this family in your prayers. I'm sure there are still many hard days to come.
(http://chapmanchannel.typepad.com/jim/)

Here she is...

I would like to formally introduce all of you to the new addition to our family!! Her name is Paisley. Oh good gracious. She is just the cutest little thing ever. Too bad she won't stay this small forever. We will be bringing this beauty home on Sunday August the 17th so stay tuned I'm sure we will have some interesting pictures and some amazing stories once we see what life will really be like with a Great Dane!